By the power of Jesus, you no longer have power over me.
I was free born.
You may have used my relationship with God to manipulate me into your web of lies; but, I see you for what you are. So does God.
You cannot deceive God.
You may not be in jail for what you did; but, be aware you will sit in the judgment seat.
You are guilty!
ever present reminding me
that I am not enough.
I will never be enough.
The shame is too deep,
the pain is now everlasting.
I am in anguish.
But more than that.
Disappointed in humanity.
There is a pain in our country
that I feel as my own.
They are tied together as one.
I release this.
With harassment running rampant and having to serve the mission before my needs left me with a nervous breakdown right before I had to retire.
Don't get me wrong, I am more than grateful that I got to retire at 20 years. But, quite frankly I served all 20 years with integrity.
I do not regret one single decision. They were from a place of honesty and definitely my pain.
So maybe I was in more relationships than I would like to see for my daughter, but that is not my shame.
Maybe I drank too much on too many occasions. That too is not my shame.
How others take advantage of us as survivors of abuse in not our fault. It will never be our fault; the shame lies on them and them alone.