Freaking Out

I am not a millennial because I am twenty years older than that generation. However, I believe in triggers like there is no tomorrow.

My biggest trigger is my father-in-law whom I honestly love. But he reminds me so much of my childhood rapist it is scaring the f*ck out of me.

I am seeing him more lately because I thought I was over it. But once I remembered out nervous I was when I saw him earlier today, I had to cry hard. It is beyond overwhelming.

This may be the hardest thing I've ever confronted in my life so far. This is my biggest fear.

Please pray for me to your god, because I need it.