I do not claim to have it all figured out, but why would a so called "loving" parent cause harm to you? Does this make me broken or even stupid for loving them? I definitely can claim I knew nothing different.
It's just their love is blemished and broken. You cannot truly love someone and hurt them as well, right? I don't understand it.
I reject this kind of love, tainted and poisonous. There is no room in my heart now for your version of love.